Adoption Update: Together Again!

Claire is "home"!!!!  During rounds on Friday, the doctor told Justin that they weren't ready to discharge her but that Sunday was a major Polish holiday so there would only be students in the hospital until Tuesday .... so Justin decided to jail break her :-/. He promised the doctor that we were well-trained and purchased a nebulizer and picked up her prescriptions on their way home. Imagine my surprise when they showed up ;).  She actually did pretty well overnight, Justin and I each took a shift and she had a few worrisome moments but she is doing well this morning. Her 02 is 94-95 today which is much better than it was a few days ago but still not perfect. It is still lower at night but that is to be expected. Go Claire!!

I decided to take advantage of the "one baby" morning and give Amelia a bath ... we had kept putting it off because we were worried it would be traumatic for her and we are trying to limit things that might upset her until she is more comfortable with us. She did better than I expected at first, she cried at first but then calmed down, she wouldn't look at me but that's still typical especially in moments where she feels overstimulated. Once she seemed completely comfortable, I decided to try to wash her hair (since it hasn't been washed in at least two weeks and was collecting an embarrassing amount of food/sticky Kiesel :-/) and she immediately tensed up and put her face completely under the water like she just wanted to get away. My hands were covered in soap and I was NOT expecting it so it took me a second to react but I pulled her up out of the water and she didn't cough or gasp like I had expected, it was if she had done this many times before and knew how to hold her breath. I called for Anna to come help me rinse her off while Amelia strained against me to try to get her head back under the water as if she couldn't handle the washing unless she could somehow get her head back under :(. Despite my best efforts, she did get back under one more time. I got her out and cried and held her until she calmed down, it was a really scary experience, seeing her so afraid and with such intense determination to get under the water. I will make sure to have Justin nearby the next time that we try.

She still would spend the entire day biting on a cup and rocking back back and forth all alone if she could but she is starting to REACH for me to pick her up when she sees me!!!!!! And she looks up at me a little more each day. She will sometimes let Levi play with her but she has NO interest in Claire or Anna and tenses up/grinds her teeth/grunts at them if they come anywhere near her. We know it will just take time and Anna is starting to understand and be more patient. Initially, her feelings were very hurt. The Tula still works well for getting her to let me "in," I think it limits her stimulation and allows her to relax so she can tolerate me touching her.

We still haven't found anything solid that she will eat - she had half a bowl of rice cereal on Thursday afternoon (exactly a week since the last time she had solid food) and has refused everything since but she has been eating formula even when she is awake!!!!  Which is a huge improvement from only drinking Kiesel in her sleep ;).  It really seems to be a texture thing, I need to find something with NO texture that is thick and nutritious - she gags on things that are the consistency of baby food or yogurt, I make the rice cereal very thick but I think it has too much texture for her to like it.

I'm not sure if you remember but when we came in July, the nuns had told us that she HATED to be touched (remember she wasn't even able to lift her head), they had left her in a bouncy seat all day and night as that was the only stimulation she could tolerate - even for eating and sleeping. They told us that between our trips, they started working with her (massage, PT, eating solid food, and now I also think bathing as well) as they really wanted to impress us but all of the changes have been a lot for her. They did tell us that the training that they did with the spoon was very traumatic for her and they truly are not the least bit surprised that she isn't eating :(.

We know that in time it will be like she has always been with us! And we are patiently enjoying all of the small improvements each day. We truly feel so so so blessed to be here and to be able to show love to such a precious little girl who has never been touched except to quickly meet her basic needs, or been outside, or had toys, or experienced love.

Tomorrow is a major national holiday here (All Saints' Day - http://culture.polishsite.us/articles/art10fr.htm) so everything will be closed both tomorrow and Monday. And then we have court on Tuesday at 10am (that's 1am back home) when Amelia will become a Howell!!!!  Tuesday afternoon we will travel by train back to Warsaw (and all breathe a big sigh of relief as we will be near a much bigger hospital for the girls!!) where we will stay for the duration of the appeal period and until we leave. We do have to travel back down here once to pick up Amelia's new birth certificate (!!) before we can apply for her passport and visa but we think Justin might do that alone as it is much easier than bringing all of the kids.

It was confirmed at our social worker visit what I thought I had translated properly from Amelia's current birth certificate, that her parents didn't give her a name (her name on her birth certificate is blank) but that she was assigned a name by an officer at the civil registry office and it was added as a note at the bottom of the certificate about a month after she was born :(. She wasn't given a middle name so we will be giving her one.

Justin and I were talking last night about how sharing the journey is the hardest and most vulnerable part for us... knowing how to love and care for Amelia feels completely natural, like we were made to do it!!! We have studied, we have read, we have taken classes, we have prepared in every way we could think of, but most importantly, God has prepared us specifically for how to care for THIS little girl and we see evidence of that every day. We truly aren't afraid or worried, we are confident and we know that He has called us to her and her to us and that no matter how long it takes, how emotional it is, or how long the days may be, she is ours and she is with us forever - He will supply all of our needs. But we continue to share because we know that through our sharing, more families will be made aware of what orphans with special needs experience and might consider opening their hearts and homes to one (or more) of them and even beyond that, people will be able to see the work of God through Amelia's journey. What an honor to get to have a front-row seat! She is such a treasure.

For you know that it was not with perishable things such as silver or gold that you were redeemed from the empty way of life handed down to you from your ancestors, but with the precious blood of Christ, a lamb without blemish or defect. -1 Peter 1:18-19

Thank you for cheering us on!

Adoption Update: Hospitalization

It has been a busy few days. Claire was admitted to the hospital two days ago. She is having a lot of difficulty breathing and her oxygen saturation is low. She is doing better but still not well enough to come "home." They are giving her steroids and two additional breathing medications. They do not have the right equipment to give Claire oxygen so they have told us that they are worried about that. There has been one doctor and one nurse that have spoken English so thankfully on the second day we were finally able to understand what was happening! She is about 30-40 minutes away from where we are staying as it is the nearest hospital that admits children.

The hospital is nothing like we are used to and we are about three and a half hours south of the main city here in Poland so it is quite a small hospital. There are no monitors, everything is done with paper charts, there are 3-5 beds per room, they "sterilized" Claire's arm for her IV with a wet paper towel, the breathing treatments are done in one room with lots of breathing "stations" (and I'm sure germs!!!), nothing seems clean, and after three days we still have not seen a single square of toilet paper anywhere (ya, we know .... yuck!!!!). But the staff has been very gracious and has done their best to take good care of us, we imagine that they all want to see the silly American family ;)! And they all are very curious about Claire as well, we imagine it isn't often that they see children with Down syndrome and certainly not ones who haven't been swaddled in cribs or strapped in bouncer chairs their whole lives :(.

You can imagine how worried we have been having her struggle so much, being away from all of Claire's regular specialists, being in such a different environment without the confidence that she is getting the care that she needs, and then not being able to communicate with the doctors!  But God is good and she is getting better!!

There is no internet at the hospital so we haven't been able to keep in touch. I spent the first day/night with Claire and then Justin and I switched yesterday because we had a social worker visit for Amelia and we felt like it was very important for her to see that we were not choosing one sick girl over the other and Justin was feeling overwhelmed here with the other three since Amelia is also sick and has only really bonded with me so far. Last night was the first moment that I've ever not been with Claire when she was in the hospital, and not only that but I had NO way to check on her!!!  There was lots of worship music playing and scripture quoting going on here!  I showed the kids pictures of her but Anna was very upset and Levi had FOUR accidents last night :(. Today we will go to switch back but we can't visit as it would involve loading up all of the kids, taking all of the carseats into the hospital, and then re-loading them back into another taxi when we are ready to go, not to mention we worry about them catching something since there are so many sick children in the same space :-/.  So we will leave the kids (and carseats) in the taxi (I know, yikes!) and run in/send the other one out right back out quickly. What an adventure!

Amelia has been on antibiotics for 4 days now and her fever finally went away yesterday (after 6 days!). She actually seemed excited to see me when I got back yesterday and ate half a bowl of rice cereal (her first time eating any solid food since last Thursday) and drank 3 bottles! She isn't eating this morning but hopefully she will try again sometime today.

The social worker visit went well considering I made it to the apartment with only 30 minutes to go, the apartment was a mess, and the kids weren't dressed! I got everyone ready to go, the apartment tidy, and a plate of cookies set out just in time. Amelia fell asleep about 5 minutes into the visit again but the social worker said not to worry and that it must mean she is comfortable here. She asked questions about how Amelia is doing but actually seemed more interested in learning about Down syndrome and asked lots of general questions about Ds. We hope we made a big impact!

Please pray for Claire! This is hard in so many ways but we know that God is bigger than our circumstances. Thank you.

Adoption Update: Adventure

We had quite the day today!

Amelia woke up with a 103.1 fever and because we aren't very familiar with what is typical for her and don't want to risk anything giving them reason to not let us adopt her, we decided that it was important that we find a way to get her to a doctor. I called a cab and her and I went 30km to the orphanage, and asked for help. God literally worked it ALL out. There was a doctor THERE!! The translator came over to help for FREE. And the taxi waited the entire time we were with the doctor, drove us back, and charged so little I was in shock!! I couldn't even talk to him to tell him what I was doing (or ask him to wait) so he had no idea. It was very hard for me to hop into a cab alone with a sick baby with no idea where we were going, if anyone at the orphanage or along the way would be able to understand me, or what we were going to do but I knew we had to just do it, God made a way, and we did it!!!

The doctor said that her throat was very, very red but otherwise she looks good. She gave us two prescriptions (an antibiotic and probiotic) and had us pick up two OTC meds as well. We are doing everything they say until she's officially all "ours"!!!!

While we were at the orphanage with the translator, I also asked to talk to Amelia's caregiver to ask more about her eating habits and to tell her that Amelia has not been eating. I'm so glad that I did! It turns out that the list I received was what I thought it might be, simply suggestions of what babies typically eat here that I could buy at the store not what she actually eats. In fact, Amelia doesn't eat :(. The nun said that she feeds her "Kisiel" (translated: jelly) while she is SLEEPING! No wonder I can't get her to eat!!!! She said she holds up her head with one hand and holds the bottle with the other and she drinks it while she's sleeping. We bought some Kisiel and the ingredients are sugar, starch, food coloring, and flavoring. I made/tasted it and it tastes like a very thick, syrupy liquid jello, it is VERY sticky. She said that eating with a spoon is very traumatic for her and she very rarely takes a bottle from them so she is actually doing BETTER for us!!  The poor thing has never had any nutrition but her thyroid condition and this sugar drink is likely why she seems like her weight is okay :(. We are even more anxious to get her home now. I'm also very glad that we asked! I can take a big deep breath now knowing that we are doing everything we can to help her. It's going to be one-day-at-a-time for a long while and knowing all of this helps us to know how to best help her!! We have a long way to go to repair this little girl's relationship with hunger / food and figuring out how to get her the nutrition she needs to grow.

Having two sick babies the last couple of days has been quite exhausting and I've been spending every spare second communicating with Claire's docs, researching ways to possibly help Amelia, and preparing all sorts of foods and drinks all sorts of crazy ways to see what Amelia might eat since I can't read the package directions very well. We have prepared long and hard for this journey and it feels so amazing to finally be in the trenches, winning over Amelia's heart!! 

Claire is doing okay ... her fever is lower today but her cough/breathing sounds awful (very deep) and her little voice is so weak :(. She is not a happy girl. We may have to take her to a doctor here soon as well. Between the taxi, translator, doctor, and medicine ... doctor visits get very expensive, very fast!! Thankfully, I brought an O2 monitor so we are keeping a close watch on their levels and we bought a thermometer and nasal aspirator here, I wish we had a humidifier. Claire also has a bad rash from the diapers/wipes and the lack of her "usual" food is making us wonder about some symptoms/food intolerances. We will be breathing a big sigh of relief when we have these girls back home!

We have another visit from the social worker on Thursday at 1pm, hopefully the girls are feeling better by then so she can see Amelia's progress. Since she slept through the entire last visit, impressing her at this one is quite important!!

Some have asked how you can help us .... the only things we need right now are your prayers and your encouragement! Promise. The little "you're doing a great job!"/votes of confidence messages have more impact than you can imagine when it feels like we aren't being very successful at very much - advice can feel a lot like the opposite although we do know that everyone has the best of intentions. We appreciate you <3!!!!!!   Thank you for cheering us on!

Adoption Update: One Day at a Time

We have now had Amelia with us for almost six full days. Overall, she is doing well! She is opening up to us and beginning to make eye contact. On Friday I had left to grab lunch for everyone and when I got back she looked up and saw me and smiled! I cried. She doesn't look up very often at all so even just that little piece is such a triumph! This morning when she woke up, I went in to get her and the second she saw me she started screaming :( so there is definitely "good" moments of progress but also just as many moments where it is hard as well.

Getting her to eat is still the most frustrating although the orphanage has told us that everything we are experiencing is normal for her. Yesterday she went the entire day without eating a single bite and she refused every single bottle we offered as well. Today she has had three bottles (yay!) but, again, no food. Thursday she ate three bowls of rice cereal and three bottles after only eating a little here and there every day before that. Our food adventure is further complicated by the fact that I can't read the labels at the grocery store or the preparation directions once we get the food home so I'm not confident that I'm preparing the food the way that she likes it. We have tried LOTS of things and have discovered that she only likes apples or bananas (although I was able to sneak in carrots only once) and they HAVE to be diluted with rice cereal. She does not like her food to have any texture or much flavor. If I feed her the wrong thing or try to get her to eat when she isn't ready, she has a sensory meltdown including banging her head, screaming, tensing and biting herself and once she starts, we can only calm her down by getting her to fall asleep. Feeding her in a reclined position so that she can relax her whole body, making sure that she is VERY relaxed, and massaging her face and mouth before I try to feed her also seems to help. I also wonder about not having a high chair here, it will be nice when we are home and have access to other tools that may help her. Of course rice cereal and a couple of bottles per day is not enough nutrition to sustain an almost two year-old so we have a long way to go but for now we rejoice with every single bite as they are very few and far between!

Each day, she seems more relaxed to be here. She is starting to recognize us and interact more with us each day although she still "pulls back" into her own space often. And I feel like she is even starting to learn that she can communicate her needs/wants to us and we will respond, although she is definitely still learning how to do this. The Tula (baby carrier) has helped significantly to help calm her down when she starts to get overstimulated and has allowed us to take little trips to the mall and even the zoo! It helps to relax her, limits her stimulation and still lets her know that I'm here and she isn't alone.

We went to the zoo yesterday, it was Amelia's very first time ever really being outside. She did pretty well although she was not a fan of the sun ;). I'm sure others thought we were crazy because when she needed space, we had to just set her down on the ground and wait for her to be ready again but we made it and she actually slept most of the time!

Our first social worker visit on Friday went well! Amelia slept the entire time but we were able to show her pictures and tell her how she has been doing. She was very impressed with her progress and told us that she is very lucky!! Her only concern was that our older kids were "too well behaved." So we told her that we bribed them with cake and that they are usually typical kids ;). She seems to be very nice and I think court should go really well! We found out that we will not only have a judge and prosecutor but also a full jury!!! They don't take adoption lightly here, we have a lot of people to impress! We have one more visit on Thursday and then court the following Tuesday. After court, we will travel back to the capital where we will wait out the appeal period (the judge will set either a 14 or 21 day appeal period at our hearing) and then once that has passed, we can apply for her new birth certificate, visa and passport.  She also has to have a medical evaluation done by a special doctor in Warsaw before she can travel back to the US since we have applied for her to become a citizen immediately upon landing.

Please continue to pray that Amelia will eat, that the walls will continue to come down, and for strength and patience for all. There are quite a lot of tears over here... from everyone!

Thank you for cheering us on!!

I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God 

has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. - Philippians 3:14

Adoption Update: Amelia's Heart

Many people have been asking us how Amelia is doing and, although many things are going wonderfully, Justin and I both felt like it was difficult for us to put into words just how heartbreaking it has been to see how growing up in the orphanage has affected her so we thought my brother, who has his degree in psychology and has spent many years traveling to orphanages in Mexico could offer a unique and informative perspective. 

The nun shared with us on Friday that none of them ever believed that Amelia would be adopted, in fact, it hadn't even crossed their minds as a possibility. They even assigned an office person to be her legal guardian instead of their usual practice of having it be the head nun as it is much easier to get through this court process having the nun present because the church has a lot of authority in Poland. This is one of the biggest reason why we have been having so much trouble since we have been here. In Poland, and many Eastern European countries, children with disabilities are placed in orphanages and then after they reach a certain age (anywhere from 4-14 years old depending on the country), they are transferred to an adult institution where they become unadoptable and remain for the rest of their lives. Because they didn't see any other option for Amelia, she was almost always restrained to prevent self-harming (a common response for institutionalized children who seek sensory input) and was only provided for her basic needs. She was not offered physical therapy like many of the other children in the orphanage until after our trip in July as it wasn't seen as a good use of resources. She was almost two and wasn't even able to sit up. The amazing news is that she has made great progress in such a short time - not only sitting up but she is crawling! She also only eats 2 bottles of formula and one bowl of porridge per day, we have tried to give her more since she has been with us but she refuses anything else we try to give her. The bad news is the sad truth ... there are thousands of other children like her, alone and hurting, and actually many are even worse off. Our hearts are are full of so much joy but they are also broken as we watch the little girl we are so in love have to go through so much.

My brother, Willie says it best:

When my sister asked if I could assist her with explaining some of the difficulties that Amelia is experiencing, I was very excited but could also not help experiencing some trepidation. I studied psychology in college but in no way am I an expert on the matter. I also know that there is no way I can truly understand what they are going through. Nevertheless I want to support her, Justin, Anna, Levi, Claire, and Amelia in any way that I can. 

Let me start off by thanking all of you for your support for my sister and her family throughout this entire process.  It has been a long journey rife with emotion, love, and grace. Amelia is a beautiful girl and I pray every day for her that God will work through Codi and Justin in an amazing way and that she will become part of the family. For Amelia to feel like a part of the family will not be an easy process, however, and will take a lot of time, love, prayer, patience, and encouragement. 

Life in an institution is never easy. Some studies estimate that many kids will have 100 or more caregivers in the first 2 years of their lives. They almost never have toys of their own or sometimes they will have no toys at all. They are held to a very rigid structure in day-to-day activities but experience a constant change in whom they see every day. They are never able to have that bond with a loving parent-like figure that is so necessary for development in a child’s life and there is no room for flexibility in their schedule to accommodate meeting anything other than their very basic needs. Due to a lack of healthcare, support, and general knowledge of mental disabilities children with mental disabilities are usually both segregated and neglected altogether in foreign institutions. As a result of this lifestyle, kids that grow up in an institution are often physically smaller, have difficulties bonding to their adoptive families, have much higher rates of ADHD and autism and can often feel overstimulated when trying to assimilate into a new home. 

Amelia is amazing and Codi and Justin feel so blessed that they get to spend so much time with her. However, because of the aforementioned lifestyle that she is used to, she is experiencing some of the difficulties I described. One of the main behaviors that she is exhibiting is called “stimming.” Short for stimulation, stimming is an action that is repeated over and over again. It is a coping mechanism that an individual uses to protect themselves from external circumstances that they cannot control, it also provides them with the sensory input that they would otherwise get from physical touch, play, etc. This behavior is most common in children with developmental disabilities as they have a harder time expressing their needs and are often isolated and neglected. Amelia is not used to the love and attention that she is receiving from Codi, Justin, Anna, Levi, and Claire. Although they have small windows of times when she seems to enjoy their affection, it is all new to her and is causing her to become overstimulated very often. Right now she is expressing that in the only way that she knows how; by biting herself, banging her head repeatedly on walls and furniture, doing lots of rocking back and forth, grinding her teeth, and grunting/yelling. The constant head banging is a coping mechanism in order to create some sort of normalcy in the midst of change. Another behavior that Codi and Justin have noticed is that Amelia tends to always look down at the floor when sitting or crawling and very rarely looks up at people or makes eye contact. Since she most likely did not receive much attention in the orphanage, she is not used to looking up and seeing a person there waiting to give her all of the love she deserves. It seems that she was also not given toys to play with and does not really understand what to do with toys when they are placed in front of her. 

However, in light of all the difficulties, there is a lot of hope for her. Many studies have shown that children that are adopted from institutions at a young age are able to assimilate well into a family and develop many meaningful, close relationships. It may not be easy, but as loving and caring as Codi and Justin are, I have no doubt that Amelia will be an amazing loving, bright, and wonderful girl. There have already been marked improvements even though they have only been visiting her for less than a week.  

Now when all of the court proceedings are completed and they are able to take Amelia home, one of your first reactions are going to be to want to rush over and see her. (I know for me that will be very difficult not to do). However, on their behalf I ask that you be patient and give it time.  It will be a very long journey before Amelia will be fully used to her new life as a Howell and getting her used to all of the love and attention will be a very delicate process. We are all excited for the day when Codi and Justin can introduce Amelia to all of you who have been loving, supporting, caring, and praying for them throughout the year. At this point, we are not sure how long her transition will take and appreciate your patience while the adjustment period is taking place. 

As they reach the point of the trial process where Amelia lives with them in Poland, we ask for your continued prayers that Amelia can easily accept Codi and Justin as her new parents and that they may find favor in the eyes of the social worker and the judge.

“We put our hope in the Lord. He is our help and our shield. In him our hearts rejoice, for we trust in His holy name. Let your unfailing love surround us, Lord, for our hope is in you alone.” -Psalms 33:20-22

Thank you for cheering us on!  We ask for your prayers for Amelia, that the walls of her heart would begin to come down and that she would recognize us as loving parents, that her appetite would grow, that she would begin to recognize and communicate her needs and desires, and that we would be able to help her find other ways to cope with her emotions. Thank you for being patient with us while we might be doing life a little differently for a short while. We are so thankful that God chose us to go on this very special mission of winning Amelia's heart, what an honor!

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails." - 1 Corinthians 13:4-8

Adoption Update: More Good News!

We had a great day today!  The nuns allowed us to use their therapy room for our visit which the kids loved. It helped wear them out too since they were playing all day instead of reading or coloring in the small sitting room so hopefully we all get to sleep tonight!!!

And we received more news! The judge has now approved us to take Amelia permanently from the orphanage on Monday, she decided that we didn't need to have an initial hearing! The nun will go to the court to pick up our legal guardian documents on Monday morning and then we will be free to go to a nearby larger city to complete our required bonding period. The judge scheduled our final adoption hearing for November 3rd at 10am when Amelia will officially become a Howell!!!! At the hearing, the judge will set either a 14 (Nov 17) or 21 (Nov 24) day appeal period and once that time has passed, we will be able to apply for Amelia's new birth certificate, visa, and passport. After we have all of the documents (about 3-7 days later), we can come home.

We can't contain our excitement! Just three days until she will be with us forever and seventeen until she is officially ours <3!

Thank you for cheering us on!!!

Adoption Update: Progress!

Today is day four at the orphanage. Amelia is already starting to connect with us and is starting to make eye contact!!! 

We were talking today about how she has never been rocked to sleep or even just held by anyone but us. We see evidence of several protective and institutional behaviors that break our hearts but we are excited for the opportunity to show her love and to slowly help her break down the barriers she has already placed around her little heart from having everyone she has ever known come and go. 

Our translator blessed us with two space heaters and toys for the kids to play with, we found a mall to get some warmer clothes, and the kids are getting closer to being on the right schedule every day!! 

AND for the big news.... the judge approved our request for a shorter bonding period (2 weeks!), our adoption documents are being drafted as of today! The judge is going to call us on Monday to schedule a meeting either on Tuesday or Wednesday. After this, we will be able to take Amelia from the orphanage and start our official bonding period!!!!  After two weeks of official bonding, we will have our court date where the judge will ask us questions and the social worker and Amelia's legal guardian will testify to the adoption. Next we must wait through a 2-week appeal period before the judge's decision will be final and after that, we will be able to get her medical evaluation for traveling into the US, apply for her passport, visa, and new birth certificate! Then we can come home :). So all together, we have about 5.5 weeks left to go. 

Thank you for cheering us on!!  Please continue to pray for favor with the judge, for everything to go smoothly, and for Amelia's little heart.  We appreciate each one of you.

Adoption Update: In Poland!!

We got to see Amelia yesterday for the first time in three months and the kids got to meet her for the first time ever!!!!!  I can’t begin to describe how amazing it feels to finally have us all together in the same place!  The kids adore Amelia.  Anna smothers her with kisses, Levi is so patient with her and wants to share all of his toys, and Claire is very much enjoying having a playmate.  Amelia is so used to having lots of people around who come and go, it doesn’t seem that she even notices her siblings yet but in time we know she will learn to love them as they love her!  Much like last time, she has bonded more quickly than expected with both Justin and I. At first, any touch or interaction seems to upset her but with patience and persistence, she relaxes and at the end of today, was even reaching toward me wanting to be held.

You’ll have to accept my apology for not updating better, we have been exhausted!!  Even today, all of the kids fell asleep at 2pm and got a good 7 hour nap in while we visited Amelia so we likely won’t be sleeping tonight either.  Slowly but surely, they are getting closer to the right schedule!!

We are learning again that just because God calls you to do something, it doesn’t mean that it’s going to be easy!  The enemy is NOT pro-adoption and we have had quite a few bumps along the way. 

To start with the good news … we made it!!!!  A 9 hour flight, 90 minute layover (where they dumped out ALL of our bags!), another 3 hour flight, a sleepless night, a 2.5 hour train ride, a 45 minute layover outside in the snow, and another 35 minute train ride …. ALL with 4 carseats, 2 big suitcases, a diaper bag, breast pump bag and cooler, and three backpacks.  Surviving traveling with little kids is enough to make anyone feel like they can conquer anything!!!  

When we arrived at the orphanage, I had the perfect moment planned out in my head complete with beautiful reactions from the kids and a video recording. On the way there (we have to take two taxis), all of the kids fell asleep … un-wakeably asleep!  Justin and I spent about two hours alone with Amelia while the others slept on the couch and I only caught Anna’s initial reaction on camera because Levi and Claire woke up and saw her before I could get to my phone. I should know by now that life with this many little kids certainly won’t be predictable!!  And still we have those precious moments forever engrained on our hearts.

Amelia is doing well. She hasn’t grown much, if at all, since we left and Claire has grown quite a bit so they are about the same size now and are completely adorable together. 

I wish that we could share pictures with everyone but we have to be very careful until the adoption is finalized. You can be confident that I am taking lots and saving them all for you. We will be able to share them in about a month.

And for the “bumps” I mentioned …. the situation with the judge isn’t quite like we were told before we arrived. Typically the district of the court that oversees adoptions from this particular orphanage is a different division than the one that we have to use (due to the address of the orphanage worker who was assigned as Amelia’s legal guardian) so they don’t have adoptions cases very often and aren’t confident in the procedure. Because of this, things are moving much slower than they had anticipated. We were supposed to be able to pick Amelia up from the orphanage either yesterday or today to being our bonding period in a larger city where we had spent weeks finding the perfect apartment (with a playground and just across the street from coffee, food, and a big grocery store) but instead we had to find an apartment in the smaller town where the orphanage is located so that we can be within walking distance to visit with her each day while we wait until we can take her with us for good. Our apartment has no heat, no hot water, there is no nearby food, playground, or grocery store … Oh, and did I mention it’s SNOWING?  And we didn’t pack for walking back and forth in the snow. The kids are grouchy, cold, hungry, and tired and already begging to go home. Our little girl needs us so desperately …. thus, we press on!  Please join us in prayer that the judge is able to approve the start of our bonding period very soon so that we can take Amelia with us and start the 6-week “clock” of our trip.  As of right now, we could be looking at up to 2 weeks before this step is complete. The nuns have told us many times that they are so pleased with our family and one of them went to the judge personally today to see if she could help her move things along, this slower process is a new experience for them too. It’s so special to know that they are working to help us get Amelia home!  

So for now, we visit Amelia as much as they will let us and enjoy knowing that we never have to say goodbye again. This is only temporary and we ARE coming home with 4 kids …. someday.

“I called you answered, 

and you came to my rescue 

and I want to be where you are.” 

-Hillsong United "Came to my Rescue"